Painful conversations like pulling teeth!

So what's new?

Well, I'm having my wisdom teeth removed this coming Tuesday, part of getting ready to go to Canada. I don't want to have to think about my teeth while over there! They played up when I was six weeks pregnant with Jasper, so I couldn't do much about them then. I met the oral surgeon on Tuesday - seemed like a really nice guy. The thing I'm most stressed about it having to wear a hospital gown - it's such a symbolic stripping of oneself and one's autonomy. But yeah, I'm not too stressed about that, it'll just be new, my first time in hospital. I'm hoping the aftermath won't be too bad. I'm madly trying to EXPRESS myself so that Jasper doesn't dose up on my anaesthesia!

And...

I fell off my bike. So predictable. I was coming down a bit of Punt Rd (a majorly busy road), despite trying to avoid it - I was trying to get to the bike path by the river. Anyway, I had this big arse truck bearing down on me and I thought I should get out of the way. Decided to pull into a petrol station, but my bike tyre didn't handle the slight kerb very well. Slid off - could see it coming about 2 seconds before it actually happened. The damage wasn't as bad as I thought - the worst bit was a very grazed forearm. I got up straight away and didn't even feel like shedding a tear! It just added to the feeling that I was having a very bizarre day...

In the process, I scratched up my wedding ring. Showed it to Gord and he said it was symbolic of the scars we inflict on each other, which was quite meaningful, given we were kind of mid-argument. An unresolved conversation anyway. It's a bit more resolved now, but God, it's painful, when marriage functions as a mirror, as our wedding preacher said. Where the other person reflects back to you your own hurts and shortcomings. Yeah...

Other than that, I had a most lovely day yesterday. Jane, Caleb, Miri, Piper, Jas and I headed off to the Collingwood Children's Farm. Spent five hours there - talking, holding a baby, knitting, eating, drinking coffee - while the kids ran around. It's not like they totally amuse themselves, but it's so much easier when they can bounce off each other's energy. Well, easier except for when they crap on the grass! (thankfully it wasn't Piper!) I really enjoyed talking to Jane, enjoyed a woman's perspective on my unresolved conversation with my husband. I don't mean that negatively, that we bitched about Gord at all. It was just sooo nice to hear her musings on a whole range of topics, cos really, men and women think so differently about stuff. I went home feeling relieved - that was my dominant emotion - relieved that someone had understood and listened. (This is not to say that Gord hasn't been doing this!)

Dunno if I should rave on about all this, given the rather abstract nature of my ramblings, but the bottom line is, it's all good, cos this is really old stuff that I'm really glad to process, but like I said, in the moment, it's bloody painful.

But hey, I meant all that to sound positive. Hopefully it does! On a different positive note, I talked to Gord's sister today in Canada and was glad to touch base. And on another funny note, I've been cleaning out old memory boxes - basically the social paperwork (invitations, letters, etc) of previous years, and found some valentines some little girls wrote to my little brother ages ago. Too cute - I'm going to send them to him!

This is how the kids travel lately, if I need to take a pram and if Jasper doesn't need to sleep (in the sling). I love how their sibling relationship is developing- it's a joy to watch...