AWOL on retreat

Hiya! We are alive even though it doesn't seem like it! I was going to post yesterday morning and then realised we didn't have any new photos to put up, which always makes a post more interesting. Given that yesterday was Melbourne Cup Day (a public holiday in honour of one of the longest horse races in the world - and no, John, I didn't head to the bookies this year!) and we were heading to Mum and Dad's for lunch, I thought I'd bring the camera and remedy the situation. Needless to say, I walked into the study to get it, forgot what I'd come in for, and walked out of the house without it. So for now, this is one boring ramble, with nothing to break it up. Apologies, but at least you know we're alive!

I was away on a retreat for five days last week, and Gord was away on a five-day retreat the week before that. We only saw each other for two days out of twelve, so communicating with a broader audience wasn't quite on the agenda. And we all know that Gord doesn't blog, hardly ever!! So I should really say, communicating with a broader audience wasn't on MY agenda! My retreat was pretty amazing - thirteen women in the circle, two babies. I felt very clear and happy most of the time, and it wasn't until I got home and had a massive downer the next day that I realised, oh yeah, it's easy being a fantastic mum when there's heaps of people willing to hold the baby any time during the day. And oh yeah, I was away from Gord and Piper, and they're the ones who push my buttons these days, much more so than Jasper. It was hard to come home and feel I had to instantly start compromising on my parenting, because I now had two kids to deal with, and because I wasn't in that ultra-supportive circle. Thank goodness Anna and Sam came over that day, and Gord came home early from work, otherwise things could have been dreadfully grim - well, grimmer than they already were!

This is just life, I'm pretty sure, this compromising balancing act, but it was just hard running face to face with it, and my own gaping limitations, on my first (and second) day home. My mum used the analogy of gravel rash to describe the rude shock of coming back to reality after a totally fantastic experience, and I think it's rather apt! I still haven't really connected with Gord - I'm in a wierd introverted headspace. One day I guess I'll emerge.

On a different note, since coming home, and since it's now November, it's really felt like Canada is coming up quickly. This is our month for getting everything done: the packing; pick up Gord's visa; get new credit cards; find out about a visa for me, given we're staying longer than six months; find a storage solution; use up all the food in the pantry; see all our best friends; and of course, for me, MAKE CHRISTMAS PRESENTS!! Ha, we'll see how much I get done. Gord is hoping I don't make myself too busy. It has been known to happen before!

So yeah, we're slowly gearing up. I'm collecting stationary, getting into a letter-writing headspace more and more. Somehow I'd like to write a Christmas newsletter too... anway, lots of stuff on the go. So yeah, that's why we've been a bit AWOL. Oh yeah, the kids are going really well. Jasper was so amazing on the retreat! And Piper absolutely loves hanging out with Caleb and Miri at Gembrook - they're in a real swing of being together. Interestingly enough, if we weren't going to Canada we're pretty certain we'd be moving to Gembrook in the not-too-distant future. As I keep saying to people, life feels pretty dynamic, full of possibilities (except when I'm in a shitful mood!!!!!!) Okay, so maybe it hasn't seemed so full of possibilities in the last couple of days, but hey, from a broad perspective, longterm, meta-narrative... Get my drift?!

Love to all...